Grateful

I feel like our life has been so crazy and hectic and overwhelming the past few months. And not all in necessarily a bad way… just busy!

This last few months has sucked for my health, though. In good news, I am confident the Remicade infusions are kicking in and my pain level has dropped dramatically. Now, instead of chronic pains, it’s more like chronic dull ache- which I’d take any day! In not-so-good news, 2 weeks ago my GYN found 6 uterine tumors. I’m having a biopsy on Thursday and a hysterectomy on Friday. Good times.

And as if I wasn’t stressed enough going into this week, Brody decided to wake up yesterday really sick. I finally caved and took him to Children’s urgent care. And it was a good thing I did. He had decreased breath sounds (and by decreased, the nurse told me they were non-existent) on his right side, his O2 level was 89% and he was retracting terribly. A couple xrays later and he has pneumonia. So we spent some time on oxygen and getting even more nebulizer treatments, which I had actually done before we went, so it’s frightening to think his oxygen levels were that low even after treatments! He’s still struggling today, but getting slowly better.

Even though I’m overwhelmed with school (5 classes this semester!), kids, life in general and all the craziness that just comes with day-to-day life of preschoolers, I had an amazing moment tonight. I was holding Brody as he was screaming because he just didn’t feel well. After a few moments he just crashed and fell asleep on me. I held this little limp, exhausted boy and for a few minutes, all the craziness that surrounds us seemed non-existent. I had a moment to stop and just embrace this little life. It made me grateful. Grateful that I have this perfect little boy (2, if we’re being specific!), grateful that God entrusted these children to me, grateful that I’ve been blessed to have the opportunity to fulfill my dream of being a mommy. It’s hard to take moments in the busyness sometimes to just stop and give thanks. But tonight’s moment with Brody let me do just that. So even when things are uncertain, or not going the way I had hoped or wanted, I still have so much. And for everything I do have, I’m so grateful!